It’s going to be ok. Everything is going to be ok. Maybe not now, maybe not tomorrow, but it will be.
Listen. Where are you? Are you in the city? Hear the small sounds, the people sounds, the birds and the wind and the cars. They don’t have to mean anything. They just exist. Remember. You exist.
The wind. Listen for it. Is it still today? or does it roar? a light breeze that plays with your hair, runs over your skin. Let yourself hear it. Let yourself feel it.
Your breathing. It flows. is it caught at the back of your throat? That’s ok. That happens. It can be scary when it does, though. IF you’re scare, pull the breath in slowly, like you’re filling a cup and you don’t want to splash it. Hold it. Let it out. Maybe you let it out like a balloon, all at once and gasping. Maybe you let it out a little at a time, a drip from a faucet. Don’t worry.
Now again. Find the air around you. Bring it inside you. Release it outside you. It’s a circle. Remember to breathe. Breath flows like tides, in and out, and in and out.
Where are your hands? Frozen at your sides? Flapping in the air? Clenched in your lap? Loose on the bed? It doesn’t matter. Your hands can do what they want. Just remember where they are.
Can you feel your hands? Can you move them, or do they move themselves? Don’t worry about it, but just remember what they’re doing.
Look around. Where are you? Maybe it’s not a place you want to be. It’s ok. You don’t have to want to be here, even though it would be nice. Maybe it’s somewhere you do want to be. The kind of place that makes you feel warm and full of golden light, like you could be here from one dawn to next. Maybe. Maybe not.
Remember where you are.
Think about your feet. Toes, wiggling. Digging in dirt, under covers, buried in sand covered by socks in running shoes, painted nails, curled in pleasure. Heels, grinding into the ground, bouncing in the air. Ankles rotating and stretching and bending. Your feet are here. You are here.
Crying. Tears. Snot. It’s ok to cry if you want to. There are tissues somewhere, or toilet paper from the bathroom. Splash cold water on your face if you think it’ll help. Feel your face get red and remember that means you’re alive. It doesn’t always feel good. But you will feel better.
It’s going to be ok.
Written for this prompt
Reading Cactus 